Channeling divinity

Still going to take the time to keep talking about energy and talking about my life separate since sometimes the energy stuff doesn't even seem real to me.  Not really sure what my last post here was... not really sure I care.

I've been ironing out my own internal system of energy for a while now, after screwing it up by doing some Chi-Kung wrong and recently it's finally started to bounce back some.  Much of the energy work that I used to be able to do I can actually do again.  Being able to summon rain seems to be firing pretty consistently as does being able to summon the sun.  I was also able to ask for a random object from the universe and it just sort of showed up the next time I walked outside as I had envisioned it in my mind - blue, close rimmed sunglasses.  They even fit well :-P.  More over though, what I'm really starting to notice is the hum of energy as it flows through my own body.  The way that I can make my voice resonate with energy again, the way that my limbs feel like they're buzzing, and the way that I'm starting to tune into the natural world around me again.  Being able to actually feel the presence of trees is... something that hasn't happened down here in SoCal yet.  One day I just sort of randomly synced up again, I'm not sure I really have a clear way of describing that.  Something like... I got my own energy to be calm and at peace with the world around me, separate from it, but also linked into it and when I did that I found the trees because they were in a similar state, calm, separate but a part of it all.

So, while all of that is good, I still feel like I have a long ways to go.  I got sick which means I'm far from bullet proof, and it's taking a while to get out of.  I don't get sick that often (I think) but when I do it usually takes me a while to recover.  Probably something to do with being just generally overextended.  So what I want now is to go from channeling my own energy to channeling the energy of the universe, because that's the difference between having a lot of energy and having infinite energy.  Even with all the particular stunts I've pulled with energy to increase how much of it I can store, it's still very much finite.  My previous hubris was thinking it was infinite and all I got from that was all of it burned out of me.  Sure, I'd been collecting energy for years, so it took a while but it happened all the same, and after that, after all the energy I'd been used to having was gone, I just sort of fell apart and all the energy work I was able to do fell to pieces as well.  ...so! Aside from not letting someone slowly drain me of all the energy I posses, it seems like a good idea for me to actually try to build a system that's linked to something that won't collapse.  It seems like a good idea to build a system that's a bit more robust and is harder both for myself and for others to tamper with.

We'll see how that goes :-P.  For now, the simple things.  Get the energy moving through my veins, get the energy resonating in my bones, get all my chakras up and running strong, and link all the existing systems so that they reinforce one another.  THEN I can worry about trying to channel divinity since I suspect it ends in disaster if my energy systems can't handle the extra influx of power.  Chi Kung is probably the first step after I've got the rest ironed out.  *sigh* so much work to do even after so much progress made, ah well, onward.